One Becomes Three
I had a wonderful visit with my niece yesterday. She's expecting her first baby and is having a rough time with her first trimester. (That's a huge understatement, but I won't get into details.) She seemed so relieved to have me there to offer a little female support. I made my famous chicken and rice soup. I brought essential oils and tea. She looked like a little angel, all tiny and pale. I just wanted to scoop her up and take her home with me, but I didn't. I just sat with her while she ate her soup and we chatted about pregnancy, babies, husbands and family.
This young woman is now a mother. She's very aware of the life growing inside of her. Her fiance is very calm, kind and supportive. He's been doing everything he can to help her feel better. I love that. I love to see a couple working together and supporting one another. They are now a family, even though the baby is only the size of a 'green olive' (my niece's words).
It really doesn't matter how big the baby is right now. It only matters that the baby is alive and growing, during every second of every day. My niece can feel the hormonal impact of the baby. She can feel the physical impact, big time. Her fiance can't feel those things, but he's part of it. He takes care of her. They are both doing exactly what they need to do.
Enter the supportive aunt. That's me. I'm not squeamish. I'm not afraid to talk about anything. She felt comfortable sharing with me. I shared things with her, but stayed focused on the positive. This isn't my story. I'm not the pregnant mommy anymore. I never will be again. So, I stayed focused on her.
The goal is healthy baby, healthy mom and helpful dad. She has a long way to go, but it will seem like no time at all, once she holds that beautiful baby in her arms. All the pain and waiting will dissolve instantly and she will be happier than she's ever been. Then she'll watch her husband become a new man. He will still be her love, but when he sees his baby, he will soften even more. He will cry. He will step into the role of protector, nurturer and DAD. He will provide for his family and take on all the stress and responsibility that goes along. I have every confidence that he will do those things beautifully.
My niece has been babysitting for my boys since they were tiny. She was one of my first visitors, after we brought Soren home. I never felt like she was judging me. She doesn't judge. She's loves and accepts. She loves our boys like they're her own. They love her like she's some sort of angel and look at her like she's the most beautiful woman they've ever seen. She's gentle, calm, and thoughtful. She's also strong. She's stronger than she even knows.
I love to see the transformation happen. When two people come together and can't imagine being with anyone else, then you have the beginning of the family. When they create a new life, they are a family. When the baby is born, the love is exponentially increased. Two become One. One becomes three. I know the math doesn't quite work, but that's what happens.
It isn't easy. It isn't without challenges and exhaustion. It will seem impossible at times. But, at the end of the day, it is the most beautiful thing that two human beings can ever do. It is our purpose, both personally and as a species. It is the natural order.
I hope my niece and nephew will continue to let me help. I will be there in any way that works for them. I'll bring dinner. I'll give massages. I'll make tea. I'll take care of the baby so they can rest. Those are my offers and that's all I'm able to do. The rest is up to them. I wish them all the luck in the world.
This young woman is now a mother. She's very aware of the life growing inside of her. Her fiance is very calm, kind and supportive. He's been doing everything he can to help her feel better. I love that. I love to see a couple working together and supporting one another. They are now a family, even though the baby is only the size of a 'green olive' (my niece's words).
It really doesn't matter how big the baby is right now. It only matters that the baby is alive and growing, during every second of every day. My niece can feel the hormonal impact of the baby. She can feel the physical impact, big time. Her fiance can't feel those things, but he's part of it. He takes care of her. They are both doing exactly what they need to do.
Enter the supportive aunt. That's me. I'm not squeamish. I'm not afraid to talk about anything. She felt comfortable sharing with me. I shared things with her, but stayed focused on the positive. This isn't my story. I'm not the pregnant mommy anymore. I never will be again. So, I stayed focused on her.
The goal is healthy baby, healthy mom and helpful dad. She has a long way to go, but it will seem like no time at all, once she holds that beautiful baby in her arms. All the pain and waiting will dissolve instantly and she will be happier than she's ever been. Then she'll watch her husband become a new man. He will still be her love, but when he sees his baby, he will soften even more. He will cry. He will step into the role of protector, nurturer and DAD. He will provide for his family and take on all the stress and responsibility that goes along. I have every confidence that he will do those things beautifully.
My niece has been babysitting for my boys since they were tiny. She was one of my first visitors, after we brought Soren home. I never felt like she was judging me. She doesn't judge. She's loves and accepts. She loves our boys like they're her own. They love her like she's some sort of angel and look at her like she's the most beautiful woman they've ever seen. She's gentle, calm, and thoughtful. She's also strong. She's stronger than she even knows.
I love to see the transformation happen. When two people come together and can't imagine being with anyone else, then you have the beginning of the family. When they create a new life, they are a family. When the baby is born, the love is exponentially increased. Two become One. One becomes three. I know the math doesn't quite work, but that's what happens.
It isn't easy. It isn't without challenges and exhaustion. It will seem impossible at times. But, at the end of the day, it is the most beautiful thing that two human beings can ever do. It is our purpose, both personally and as a species. It is the natural order.
I hope my niece and nephew will continue to let me help. I will be there in any way that works for them. I'll bring dinner. I'll give massages. I'll make tea. I'll take care of the baby so they can rest. Those are my offers and that's all I'm able to do. The rest is up to them. I wish them all the luck in the world.
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