Does it Pass the Headline Test?
I can't take the credit for this idea, either. This is my dad's concept and it basically means that if you're not sure about something, say it out loud and decide if it would make a good headline in the paper. For example, today at Soren's swimming lesson, one of the other moms was watching her seven year old daughter take her lesson. The instructor for her daughter's class (of only two children) was sitting on the side of the pool. She didn't get in the water. She didn't even appear to be watching the girls most of the time. The mom leaned over to me and said, 'Do you see that instructor? She's not even in the pool and she doesn't seem to be paying attention.'
I watched the young woman for a few minutes and the mom was right. The instructor's bathing suit wasn't even wet and she was just telling the girls what to do from time to time, but not offering any real instruction about improving their strokes. We watched this go on for most of the lesson. Finally, I said, 'Well, I would probably say something to her manager. You're paying for lessons and your daughter isn't getting any real instruction. Also, if the kids need help, the instructor isn't close enough to really do anything. That's a safety issue.' There were about six classes being taught at the same time. There were at least 20 kids in the section of the pool that was roped off for lessons.
Did it pass the headline test? Let's see:
Instructor Sits on the Side While Seven Year Old's Sink or Swim!
This definitely fails the test! The mom went to the manager. We saw the manager go and speak to the instructor at the end of the lesson. The mom seemed embarrassed and uncomfortable. I said, 'I know it's hard to watch someone get in trouble, but this isn't your fault. She wasn't doing her job. Hopefully, she'll do a better job next time.'
I use the headline test a lot. It works in almost any situation, but especially in parenting. As a full-time parent, you are your own boss. Unless you are doing something that involves Child Protective Services, no one's going to tell you what to do or how to do it. This is my favorite thing about the job, but it's also a huge responsibility. When I'm unsure of my decisions, or if I feel that I've made the wrong choice, I just do the headline test. I failed the test recently when I clouded up and rained all over Soren. I thought he'd thrown a toy because I heard a big thump. I went running in and yelled at him for throwing when he knows he shouldn't. As I turned the corner into the room, I saw Soren sitting quietly at the table, coloring. Kieran, however, was on the floor and pushing his drum around. That was the source of the big thump.
Mom Punishes Son Before Understanding the Whole Story
I then apologized to Soren, reevaluated the situation and thought about how I could make a better choice the next time. Next time, I will wait to assess the situation before I yell. Better yet, I won't yell at all. I'll calmly deal with the issue.
It's a way of keeping yourself in check. If no one else is going to test me, I have to test myself.
I watched the young woman for a few minutes and the mom was right. The instructor's bathing suit wasn't even wet and she was just telling the girls what to do from time to time, but not offering any real instruction about improving their strokes. We watched this go on for most of the lesson. Finally, I said, 'Well, I would probably say something to her manager. You're paying for lessons and your daughter isn't getting any real instruction. Also, if the kids need help, the instructor isn't close enough to really do anything. That's a safety issue.' There were about six classes being taught at the same time. There were at least 20 kids in the section of the pool that was roped off for lessons.
Did it pass the headline test? Let's see:
Instructor Sits on the Side While Seven Year Old's Sink or Swim!
This definitely fails the test! The mom went to the manager. We saw the manager go and speak to the instructor at the end of the lesson. The mom seemed embarrassed and uncomfortable. I said, 'I know it's hard to watch someone get in trouble, but this isn't your fault. She wasn't doing her job. Hopefully, she'll do a better job next time.'
I use the headline test a lot. It works in almost any situation, but especially in parenting. As a full-time parent, you are your own boss. Unless you are doing something that involves Child Protective Services, no one's going to tell you what to do or how to do it. This is my favorite thing about the job, but it's also a huge responsibility. When I'm unsure of my decisions, or if I feel that I've made the wrong choice, I just do the headline test. I failed the test recently when I clouded up and rained all over Soren. I thought he'd thrown a toy because I heard a big thump. I went running in and yelled at him for throwing when he knows he shouldn't. As I turned the corner into the room, I saw Soren sitting quietly at the table, coloring. Kieran, however, was on the floor and pushing his drum around. That was the source of the big thump.
Mom Punishes Son Before Understanding the Whole Story
I then apologized to Soren, reevaluated the situation and thought about how I could make a better choice the next time. Next time, I will wait to assess the situation before I yell. Better yet, I won't yell at all. I'll calmly deal with the issue.
It's a way of keeping yourself in check. If no one else is going to test me, I have to test myself.
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