Always and Never
We've all heard that consistency is a good thing when it comes to parenting. That being said, we have to be careful when we say, 'I always do this' or 'I never do that'. Those statements are rarely accurate. We might want them to be accurate. We might perceive them to be accurate. They aren't.
Here's a humbling example from my own life this week. Things were off to a great start. We had a wonderful weekend, just the four of us. It was the first relaxing weekend we'd had in quite a while. We hung out at home, took a picnic to the park and just enjoyed being together. Both of our boys have been napping at the same time every day. They've been going to bed at night with no issues. They've been sleeping through the night. During the day, I can take them almost anywhere. They're cooperative and in good spirits. Soren (the three-year-old) has been listening and doing as I ask. Kieran (the 10 month old) seems happy and content to be out and about. Soren and I have been working on letter sounds, counting and simple addition during Kieran's morning naps. We've been doing art and science projects. He's even been helping me clean and cook.
I was really starting to feel like a pro! My confidence, on a scale of 1 to 10, was an 11. I should have known better. Just when things seem really fabulous, that's when you have to be on your guard! That's when the next challenge is lurking just around the corner. That's when your kids seem to say, 'Feeling confident, Mom? Well, check this out!'
This time the humbling experience is presenting itself in the form of sleep issues. Kieran, who had been sleeping through the night for quite some time, has suddenly started waking up crying several times a night. I'm sure it's related to a growth spurt, teething, night terrors, dogs barking outside, loss of binky, wet diaper... or all of the above. It doesn't really matter. My husband and I still have to take turns going into Kieran's room, replacing the binky, changing his diaper or giving him a bottle and settling him back down. This has only been going on for the last four nights, but it feels like we've taken a huge step backward.
Is it the end of the world? No. But, when you feel like you're really making progress and then something like this starts happening, you can't help but wonder what you've done wrong. Is he getting enough to eat during the day? Is he too cold? Too hot? Is he too dependent on the binky? Should I go in or let him settle himself back down? We automatically assume that the issue is our fault and that we have to find the solution. Well, I'm going to stop that nonsense. Sometimes, things are beyond our control and even beyond our influence. Kieran is just going through another little developmental phase. It will pass. He will sleep through the night again. For now, we just have to ride it out.
So, no, I can't say, 'My children always sleep through the night.' So what? At least I don't have to say, 'My children never sleep through the night.' That's going to have to be enough for now. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
Here's a humbling example from my own life this week. Things were off to a great start. We had a wonderful weekend, just the four of us. It was the first relaxing weekend we'd had in quite a while. We hung out at home, took a picnic to the park and just enjoyed being together. Both of our boys have been napping at the same time every day. They've been going to bed at night with no issues. They've been sleeping through the night. During the day, I can take them almost anywhere. They're cooperative and in good spirits. Soren (the three-year-old) has been listening and doing as I ask. Kieran (the 10 month old) seems happy and content to be out and about. Soren and I have been working on letter sounds, counting and simple addition during Kieran's morning naps. We've been doing art and science projects. He's even been helping me clean and cook.
I was really starting to feel like a pro! My confidence, on a scale of 1 to 10, was an 11. I should have known better. Just when things seem really fabulous, that's when you have to be on your guard! That's when the next challenge is lurking just around the corner. That's when your kids seem to say, 'Feeling confident, Mom? Well, check this out!'
This time the humbling experience is presenting itself in the form of sleep issues. Kieran, who had been sleeping through the night for quite some time, has suddenly started waking up crying several times a night. I'm sure it's related to a growth spurt, teething, night terrors, dogs barking outside, loss of binky, wet diaper... or all of the above. It doesn't really matter. My husband and I still have to take turns going into Kieran's room, replacing the binky, changing his diaper or giving him a bottle and settling him back down. This has only been going on for the last four nights, but it feels like we've taken a huge step backward.
Is it the end of the world? No. But, when you feel like you're really making progress and then something like this starts happening, you can't help but wonder what you've done wrong. Is he getting enough to eat during the day? Is he too cold? Too hot? Is he too dependent on the binky? Should I go in or let him settle himself back down? We automatically assume that the issue is our fault and that we have to find the solution. Well, I'm going to stop that nonsense. Sometimes, things are beyond our control and even beyond our influence. Kieran is just going through another little developmental phase. It will pass. He will sleep through the night again. For now, we just have to ride it out.
So, no, I can't say, 'My children always sleep through the night.' So what? At least I don't have to say, 'My children never sleep through the night.' That's going to have to be enough for now. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
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