Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance: The state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change.
We're all on a journey. Right now, my journey is focused on my health, self-improvement and my children's education. Many of my behavioral decisions are in line with those goals. One of them is not.
I started smoking, again, in January. It's now been over four months since I bought that pack. It was supposed to be a vacation thing. We were in Florida for three weeks. I don't smoke in front of my kids, but I snuck outside enough times to smoke half a pack a day. I was going to quit before we came home. I didn't. I was going to quit after I joined the Hottie Body Fitzness Challenge. I didn't. I was going to quit before Valentine's Day. I didn't.
I set many 'quit dates'. I failed. I had every intention of quitting after my last cigarette last night. I went out and bought a pack this morning. Smoking does not fit into my healthy plan. It doesn't fit into any healthy plan. So, why am I doing it?
I started reading a book that is supposed to help me quit. I hope to finish it this week. Supposedly, after I finish reading it, I will never want to pick up a cigarette again. That makes me excited and more than a little nervous. What if it doesn't work? What if it does?
I've quit many times before. I didn't smoke when I was pregnant or nursing. The last time I quit, it was for a very long time. I couldn't imagine ever smoking again. I grew to hate the smell, the taste and the idea of smoking. It is an addiction, but I always thought I was better than that. I thought I was smarter and stronger than a person who becomes addicted to something. I was confident that I could stop whenever I wanted to.
The book I'm reading talks about the sneakiness of nicotine addiction. No one really likes the taste or feel of their first cigarette, so they can't imagine ever becoming addicted. We have to force ourselves to finish that first one and the next. Eventually, we convince ourselves that we like it. We're already hooked at that point.
The book talks about how smoking slowly begins to take over our lives. We start to plan our activities based on when we can have our next cigarette. We avoid people who judge us or make negative comments. We say it's because we don't want to be controlled by other people. In reality, we are allowing ourselves to be controlled by a pack of cigarettes.
It's not easy to smoke in our society. It's not just a 'fun, social thing', like it used to be. You can't smoke in bars or restaurants. You can't smoke around children. You can't smoke in theaters or stadiums. You can't smoke in your home, if you have kids. Even going outside of a building isn't enough, in some settings. The cost of cigarettes is extremely high. When I started, 23 years ago, you could buy a pack for less than $2.00. Now, it's over $6.00. If you're a smoker today, you're a social pariah and you're going broke. If you smoke a pack a day, you're spending over $2000 a year on cigarettes. Then there's the damage you're doing to your lungs, and the rest of your body.
Still, I went out this morning and bought a pack. How pathetic! It's no longer cool. It's not sophisticated. It's just gross. I've always been a bit rebellious. Part of me likes to be doing the thing that everyone else thinks is bad. The problem is, I also know it's bad. It's bad for my health. So, continuing to smoke is a form of cognitive dissonance. Doing something I know is horrible for me is counter-intuitive.
This is the last thing on my healthy lifestyle list. I'm eating moderately and working out daily, but it's not enough. I keep saying that I'm 'all in' when I post on the Hottie Body Fitzness Challenge facebook page. I'm not. I'm not 'all in' if I'm doing something that is so unhealthy. I'm going to finish that book today. The book will not be a magic cure, but it will help me think about this in a new way. Wish me luck. I'll let you know how it goes.
We're all on a journey. Right now, my journey is focused on my health, self-improvement and my children's education. Many of my behavioral decisions are in line with those goals. One of them is not.
I started smoking, again, in January. It's now been over four months since I bought that pack. It was supposed to be a vacation thing. We were in Florida for three weeks. I don't smoke in front of my kids, but I snuck outside enough times to smoke half a pack a day. I was going to quit before we came home. I didn't. I was going to quit after I joined the Hottie Body Fitzness Challenge. I didn't. I was going to quit before Valentine's Day. I didn't.
I set many 'quit dates'. I failed. I had every intention of quitting after my last cigarette last night. I went out and bought a pack this morning. Smoking does not fit into my healthy plan. It doesn't fit into any healthy plan. So, why am I doing it?
I started reading a book that is supposed to help me quit. I hope to finish it this week. Supposedly, after I finish reading it, I will never want to pick up a cigarette again. That makes me excited and more than a little nervous. What if it doesn't work? What if it does?
I've quit many times before. I didn't smoke when I was pregnant or nursing. The last time I quit, it was for a very long time. I couldn't imagine ever smoking again. I grew to hate the smell, the taste and the idea of smoking. It is an addiction, but I always thought I was better than that. I thought I was smarter and stronger than a person who becomes addicted to something. I was confident that I could stop whenever I wanted to.
The book I'm reading talks about the sneakiness of nicotine addiction. No one really likes the taste or feel of their first cigarette, so they can't imagine ever becoming addicted. We have to force ourselves to finish that first one and the next. Eventually, we convince ourselves that we like it. We're already hooked at that point.
The book talks about how smoking slowly begins to take over our lives. We start to plan our activities based on when we can have our next cigarette. We avoid people who judge us or make negative comments. We say it's because we don't want to be controlled by other people. In reality, we are allowing ourselves to be controlled by a pack of cigarettes.
It's not easy to smoke in our society. It's not just a 'fun, social thing', like it used to be. You can't smoke in bars or restaurants. You can't smoke around children. You can't smoke in theaters or stadiums. You can't smoke in your home, if you have kids. Even going outside of a building isn't enough, in some settings. The cost of cigarettes is extremely high. When I started, 23 years ago, you could buy a pack for less than $2.00. Now, it's over $6.00. If you're a smoker today, you're a social pariah and you're going broke. If you smoke a pack a day, you're spending over $2000 a year on cigarettes. Then there's the damage you're doing to your lungs, and the rest of your body.
Still, I went out this morning and bought a pack. How pathetic! It's no longer cool. It's not sophisticated. It's just gross. I've always been a bit rebellious. Part of me likes to be doing the thing that everyone else thinks is bad. The problem is, I also know it's bad. It's bad for my health. So, continuing to smoke is a form of cognitive dissonance. Doing something I know is horrible for me is counter-intuitive.
This is the last thing on my healthy lifestyle list. I'm eating moderately and working out daily, but it's not enough. I keep saying that I'm 'all in' when I post on the Hottie Body Fitzness Challenge facebook page. I'm not. I'm not 'all in' if I'm doing something that is so unhealthy. I'm going to finish that book today. The book will not be a magic cure, but it will help me think about this in a new way. Wish me luck. I'll let you know how it goes.
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